Worn

What happens when you hit rock bottom?  What happens when you think you’ve hit rock bottom and you fall even further?  What happens when you just don’t think you can look up to Jesus?  If you’re human, you’ve probably been in one of these situations before, probably more times than you’d like to admit.  So have I, I think its part of being human, one of those unfortunate things that happened with the fall of man.  Before man fell, these issues never were a problem, with such a close communion with God, there was no place for these, but with the bite of that fruit, everything changed.  

Tenth Avenue North has written a song that should come as a relief to those of us who have struggled with these problems.  In three verses they hit the crux of the issue, how it feels, how I feel.  

I’m Tired I’m worn

My heart is heavy

From the work it takes

To keep on breathing

I’ve made mistakes

I’ve let my hope fail

My soul feels crushed

By the weight of this world

I know I need to lift my eyes up

But I'm too weak

Life just won’t let up

And I know that you can give me rest

So I cry out with all that I have left

My prayers are wearing thin

Yeah, I’m worn

Even before the day begins

Yeah, I’m worn

I’ve lost my will to fight

I’m worn

So, heaven come and flood my eyes

Right here we have it, between feeling down, heavy hearted, not being able to breathe, being weak, having a hard life, prayers not being answered, and most of all, just being worn.  That sums up humanity, that sums up me some days (more days than I’d like to admit).  What do we want?  What do we really want?  What do we need is a better question?  What will really fix this?  What will give us the relief that we really need?  They have a very good answer in the last few lines of the song.  The simple answer is we need God and that is the sentiment that the song gives.  

Let me see redemption win

Let me know the struggle ends

That you can mend a heart

That’s frail and torn

I wanna know a song can rise

From the ashes of a broken life

And all that’s dead inside can be reborn

Cause all that’s dead inside will be reborn

The real idea is that we want God to become real in our lives, its not saying that we want him to fix everything right now, its asking him to show us proof that in the end everything WILL work out to the way He says it will.  It comes in words like, let me see, let me know, I want to know, these are all future tense, not present.  This is a bold statement, its the crying of a heart that doesn’t see any other way than to challenge God.  Call me a heretic if you want to, but its my humble opinion that God is ok with challenges like this.  There have been others, primarily in the bible who have made bigger challenges than this.  So long as the challenge is honest, I don’t believe there are any issues with this.

I think Hebrews 4:16 says it best:

So let us keep on coming boldly to the throne of grace, so that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

God, thank you for giving us the reminders both in antiquity and in contemporary that show us how and when to seek you.